Review: The Miserable Mill by Lemony Snicket

Title: The Miserable Mill
Series: A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 4
Author: Lemony Snicket
Publisher: HarperCollins
Length: 195 pages
Publication Date: April 15, 2000
Reviewed Format: Hardcover, Paperback, Kindle Edition, eBook, Audiobook.
Source: Xmas Gift from my parents
My Rating: ★★★★☆
Get it @: Amazon | Book Depository

Book Description:

Dear Reader,

I hope for your sake, that you have not chosen to read this book because you are in the mood for a pleasant experience. If this is the case, I advise you to put this book down instantaneously, because of all the books describing the unhappy lives of the Baudelaire orphans, The Miserable Mill might be the unhappiest yet. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudeliare are sent to Paltryville to work in a lumbermill, and they find disaster and misfortune luring behing every log.

The pages of this book, I'm sorry to inform you, contain such unpeasantries as a giant pincher machine, a bad casserole, a man with a cloud of smoke where his head should be, a hypnotist, a terrible accident resulting in injury, and coupons.

I have promised to write down the entire history of these three poor children, buy you haven't, so if you prefer stories that are more heartwarming, please feel free to make another selection.

With all due respect,
Lemony Snicket

After the disastrous events that occurred by Lake Lachrymose the children are taken by train to a town named Paltryville where they will meet the man that is to become their new caretaker. Once the children start to live in the Lucky Smells Lumbermill they are quick to realize that there is no way things could possibly get brighter. But they also don’t really know how it could ever get much worse than how it already was. Not only do they have to live with all of the workers at the lumbermill without any possibility of fun at all. Working at the Lucky Smells Lumbermill is much more horrible than it sounds. The children are not only forced to work, but also to do it without breakfast; only a five minute break for lunch and only a light stew for dinner. With this little nutrition they have to get up early to strip bark, branches, etc. and in general prepare the logs that will be cut into boards and planks and what not. Not only do they barely eat but they also don’t get paid at all! Horrible conditions I say HORRIBLE!!! The whole story in general is sad, gloomy and depressing.

Review: The Wide Window by Lemony Snicket

Title: The Wide Window
Series: A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 3
Author: Lemony Snicket
Publisher: HarperCollins
Length: 214 Pages
Publication Date: February 25, 2000
Reviewed Format: Hardcover, Paperback, Kindle Edition, eBook, Audiobook
Source: Gift from my parents
My Rating: ★★★★☆
Get it @: Amazon | Book Depository

Book Descrption:

Dear Reader,

If you have not read anything about the Baudelaire orphans, then before you read even one more sentence, you should know this: Violet, Klaus, and Sunny are kindhearted and quick-witted, but their lives, I am sorry to say, are filled with bad luck and misery. All of the stories about these three children are unhappy and wretched, and this one may be the worst of them all. If you haven't got the stomach for a story that includes a hurricane, a signaling device, hungry leeches, cold cucumber soup, a horrible villain, and a doll named Pretty Penny, then this book will probably fill you with despair. I will continue to record these tragic tales, for that is what I do. You, however, should decide for yourself whether you can possibly endure this miserable story.

With all due respect,
 Lemony Snicket

In this book we find the children yet again going to meet another distant relative that will ‘care’ for them like their parents did, If not somewhat like it. This time the children are aboard the Fickle Ferry which takes them across Lake Lachrymose in order for them to meet their new caretaker. The woman turns out to be quite a strange, annoying, annoying and a rather paranoid person. Things aren’t exactly peaches and cream for the children; but they understand that she only means well and they are better off with her than they ever were with Count Olaf. But of course Count Olaf is still out on the loose and searching for ways to steal their fortune. Yet again he comes back and with a brand new arsenal of tricks up his sleeve.

The children don’t really have fun at Aunt Josephine’s house unlike at Uncle Monty’s. But even though their stay at Aunt Josephine’s isn’t by far the best it’s better than anything else. Although the house is in a way scary, cold and uninviting the children manage to not lose hope that dear Aunt Josephine’s paranoia will slowly lessen or diminish and things will brighten up around.

Review: The Reptile Room by Lemony Snicket

Title: The Reptile Room
Series: A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 2
Author: Lemony Snicket
Publisher: HarperCollins
Length: 190
Publication Date: September 30, 1999
Available Formats: Hardcover, Paperback, Kindle Edition, eBook, Audiobook.
Source: Xmas Gift
My Rating: ★★★★☆
Find it @: Amazon | Book Depository

Book Description:

After narrowly escaping the menacing clutches of the dastardly Count Olaf, the three Baudelaire orphans are taken in by a kindly herpetologist with whom they live happily for an all-too-brief time.

After enduring several hardships in the hands of Count Olaf the Baudelaire Children are sent to live with the kind, happy, fun, gentle, and brilliant Dr. Montgomery. He and the Children bond rather quickly. Even though the death of their parents and the abuse they suffered at the hand of Count Olaf are still fairly fresh in the children’s minds the Baudelaire’s soon find themselves having a good time while helping Dr. Montgomery or Uncle Monty as he rather have the Baudelaire Children call him.

At first, the book starts off in a very gloomy way but as the story progresses the reader may quickly find him or herself enjoying what is a seemingly happy story after all. But it’s not long before Lemony Snicket makes do on his promise of an unhappy story and takes all the joy, happiness, and cheer and smoothly turns it into despair, anxiousness, sadness and hopelessness.

Review: The Bad Beginning by Lemony Snicket

Title: The Bad Beginning
Series: A Series of Unfortunate Event, Book 1
Author: Lemony Snicket
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Length: 176 Pages
Publication Date: September 30, 1999
Available Formats: Hardcover, Paperback, Kindle Edition, eBook, Audiobook.
My Rating: ★★★★☆
Get it @: Amazon | Book Depository

Book Description:

Dear Reader,

I'm sorry to say that the book you are holding in your hands is extremely unpleasant. It tells an unhappy tale about three very unlucky children. Even though they are charming and clever, the Baudelaire siblings lead lives filled with misery and woe. From the very first page of this book when the children are at the beach and receive terrible news, continuing on through the entire story, disaster lurks at their heels. One might say they are magnets for misfortune.

In this short book alone, the three youngsters encounter a greedy and repulsive villain, itchy clothing, a disastrous fire, a plot to steal their fortune, and cold porridge for breakfast.

It is my sad duty to write down these unpleasant tales, but there is nothing stopping you from putting this book down at once and reading something happy, if you prefer that sort of thing.

With all due respect,

Lemony Snicket

This story takes place in an extremely FILTHY house owned by the strange, scary and mysterious Count Olaf. This house is set in the other side of the town in which the children live. Once the children start to live and try to adjust to their new lifestyle they are quick to realize that it will be impossible for things to get better for them. Most of the feeling of the story is one of darkness, sadness and misery with very few moments of happiness or joy.